Post Tagged with: "president"


Rick Perry Forming Exploratory Committee to Locate and Retrieve Head From Rectal Cavity

  In what many are pointing to as related to a possible 2016 Presidential run, former Texas Governor Rick Perry has recently made quite a few speaking appearances throughout the country. But just recently, Perry has officially formed an exploratory committee to attempt to locate and retrieve his head from his rectal cavity. “We ran into some trouble last time around. Almost put my foot in my mouth… you know… if I had actually opened my mouth in time. But […]

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Looks Like Netanyahu Is Now The GOP Front-Runner

This may be the curve ball people have been waiting for…

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Bush Claims ‘Affluenza’ Caused Him to Enter Iraq

It appears George W. Bush still does not regret the Iraq war, however, he has found a new reason as to why he made that fateful decision–affluenza. During a recent interview on Fox News, host Chris Wallace asked former President George W. Bush whether or not he regretted his decision to send troops into Iraq.  The former President’s response was both candid and shocking. BUSH: Well, Chris, as the decider I had to make hard decisions while in office.  I  never […]

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Fox News Catches Obama in Gigantic Super Bowl Lie

Fox News Anchors are buzzing today after they claim that President Barack Obama was once again ensnared in another controversy where he was caught telling a lie. This time they say that it occurred in a pre-Super Bowl interview with Fox’s Bill O’Reilly. “The lies are still piling up,” said Megyn Kelly. “Clearly he’s shown on tape saying to Bill O’Reilly that the score in the Super Bowl would be around 24-21 for either the Broncos or the Seahawks. But […]

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GOP Puts Phil Robertson As Lead Contender For Oval Office In 2016

Amidst the controversy regarding the suspension of Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson after his homophobic remarks, the GOP, never failing to be the opportunistic lovers of bigotry that they are, think they may have finally found their candidate for 2016. “He’s perfect,” said RNC Chair Reince Priebus. “Just look at all the love from conservatives and media attention he is receiving. He’ll undoubtedly give any Democratic candidate a run for their money. He’s adored by millions. Millions who share his hatred […]

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Trump Pretending To Think About Running For Office Again

In a phone interview with Fox News’s “Fox & Friends” Monday, Donald Trump spoke about possibly running for governor of New York against incumbent Andrew Cuomo. “This is something that just came up and I am strongly considering it, ” said the real estate aficionado. “It’s not what I was planning on doing, but millions upon millions of people have been begging me to rescue the state from the disaster it’s in. I’ve heard some people talking that the state […]

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GOP Expanding Outrage Manufacturing Operations Overseas

“We had hoped to continue manufacturing all of our false outrage in America, by Americans. But we’re really having a hard time getting anyone to do the work.”

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President Obama Declares Mississippi A Disaster Area

“We flew over in Air Force One on the way from Atlanta and were aghast at the decimated infrastructure, junked cars, neglected school.”

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Sarah Palin To Run For President — Of Own Fan Club

Sarah Palin is no stranger to being her own publicist and making sure she gets as much attention as possible at all times no matter good or bad, but it seems the former governor of Alaska would like to take over the reins of her own fan club.

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Boehner Visited By Three Ghosts, Agrees to Tax Hikes for Wealthy

House Speaker John Boehner was visited by three ghosts last night and has now agreed to increased taxes on the wealthy as part of a deal to avoid the “fiscal cliff”.

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