Posts Tagged ‘ GOP ’

GOP Slams Jolie for Murdering Innocent Breasts

May 20, 2013
By
"Angelina" "Jolie" "double" "mastectomy" "breast" "cancer" "GOP" "murder"

Although Jolie’s difficult choice to undergo surgery in the hope of reducing her chances of developing breast cancer later in life was widely praised, a majority of conservative lawmakers in the US were angered by what they called “an unbelievably reckless and inconsiderate act of breasticide.”

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GOP Asks For Pearl Harbor Investigation Because “We Still Don’t Have All the Answers”

May 17, 2013
By
Affleck_Pearl_Harbor

What did Roosevelt know and when did he know it? And more specifically, what did Hillary Clinton know and when did she know it?

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Mark Sanford Looking Forward To More Taxpayer Funded Affairs

May 8, 2013
By
"mark" "sanford" "congress" "affair" "argentina" "GOP" "republican" "cheater"

During an interview after winning South Carolina's first district, Mark Sanford revealed some of his plans for his future in Congress as well as in his own personal life.

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Rand Paul To Speak At Howard, Excited To Tell Students To Their Face He Doesn’t Support Civil Rights

April 8, 2013
By
"Rand" "Paul" "Howard" "University" "Civil" "Rights" "Act" "RNC" "Priebus" "GOP" "Republican"

"These young negroes need to know where we as a party really stand. We stand up for freedom and civil liberties. That is of course the freedom for white business owners to deny individuals from their establishments based only upon the color of skin."

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GOP Reportedly Assessing “One-Eyed Willy” Presidential Ticket

March 31, 2013
By
"Republican" "One" "eyed" "Willy" "president " " election" "2016"

A small group of Congressional Republicans held a brief press conference Friday to announce formal consideration of Willy (last name unknown) for the next election's ticket and unveil the campaign slogan "Never Say Die."

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Paul Ryan Stops Eating And Going To The Doctor To Pay Down His Mortgage In Only Five Years

March 13, 2013
By
"Paul" "Ryan" "budget" "poor" "elderly" "Republican" "GOP"

In his new "responsible" national budget plan Ryan cuts aid to the poor and elderly drastically in regards to food and medical treatment, so he feels he can do the same.

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Jeb Bush Changing His Last Name To Reagan To Better His Chances In 2016

March 5, 2013
By
"Jeb" "Bush" "2016" "GOP" "Republican" "president" "Reagan"

He is quite aware of the stigma attached to his last name ever since his brother turned out to be one of the worst presidents in United States history.

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Santa on Strike. Will Not Deliver to Republican Homes

December 12, 2012
By
"Santa" "Republican" "homes" "angry" "strike"

I unionized over 400 years ago. Before that, I’d get an elf all trained up; tinkering toys just the way I like, and then they’d up and leave for a better paying job.

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Looking For Money, Todd Akin Now Writing Book On How To Properly Rape Someone Legitimately To Avoid Pregnancy

November 27, 2012
By
"Akin" "book" "rape" "legitimate" "Free" "Wood" "Post"

Now that Todd Akin has lost his election bid for U.S. Senate and will no longer hold his seat in the House of Representatives he is looking for a new way to pay his bills.

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TwinkieGate Investigator Probes Obama About Little Debbie Affair

November 18, 2012
By
"Obama" "Twinkie" "Little" "Debbie" "affair"

Popular food-like snack company Hostess announced that they are ceasing production of their iconic treats. Shocked Americans demand answers! Is the post-election timing just a coincidence? Or is there a greater conspiracy brewing?

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