At Sunday’s press luncheon, President Obama introduced Julia Jacobs as the new U.S. Ambassador to North Korea. Julia, the University of Maryland student whose profanity-laced email to her sorority sisters went viral last month, may seem like an unusual choice. According to President Obama, “We needed to implement a new strategy in dealing with North Korea. While I am sure many will view this move as radical, I believe Julia’s creative use of the American dialect can help us send [...]
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Sarah Palin To Run For President — Of Own Fan Club
Sarah Palin is no stranger to being her own publicist and making sure she gets as much attention as possible at all times no matter good or bad, but it seems the former governor of Alaska would like to take over the reins of her own fan club.
Continue Reading →NRA: Two-Year-Old Gun Victim Should Have Been Armed
The tragic death of a two-year old Kentucky girl who was shot and killed by her five-year old brother outside their Burkesville home last week could have been easily prevented, according to the NRA.
Continue Reading →“Stop Blaming Hitler!” Says Neo-Nazi Group
Secretive neo-Nazi and white supremacist group “You Can Nazi Us” released a statement yesterday, protesting historical objections to Adolf Hitler and his impact upon the history of Nazi Germany during the World War II era.
Continue Reading →Mark Sanford Looking Forward To More Taxpayer Funded Affairs
During an interview after winning South Carolina’s first district, Mark Sanford revealed some of his plans for his future in Congress as well as in his own personal life.
Continue Reading →NRA President Jim Porter: “It’s Only A Matter Of Time Before We Can Own Colored People Again”
It seems new National Rifle Association President (NRA) president Jim Porter may have found himself in a bit of hot water.
Continue Reading →Deceased Guitarist Hanneman Kills Dozens, Maims Hundreds En Route To Damnation
Authorities across the nether regions of hell are still searching for answers in the wake of a brutal multiple homicide perpetrated by recently deceased Slayer guitarist Jeff Hanneman, reports alleged Sunday.
Continue Reading →Arizona’s Gov. Brewer Announces Adopt-a-Gun Program
A Public Disservice Announcement: Somewhere in Phoenix, Arizona a lonely AK-47 awaits its execution. Feeling alone and unwanted, covered in dust and grime it gazes out into a future that it knows it will never see. Only four years old, this heartbroken AK-47 was abandoned by its owners at a “Turn in Your Gun” event. Its fate? Destruction. Soon it will have its very essence violently torn away by the hands of liberal heathens. The promise it once held, the [...]
Continue Reading →The NRA Has Declared Itself a Religion, Gun-Worshippers Rejoice
Since they already hold non-profit status as and educational group the switch to religious affiliation will be rather seamless.
Continue Reading →House Acts Quickly To Fight Sequestration Cuts That Reduce Their Time Not Doing Anything
An emergency session of Congress was held late Wednesday afternoon as representatives from all over the nation flew back to take an emergency vote regarding new sequestration cuts.
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