CLEVELAND, OH – It was a banner opening night for the 2016 Republican National Convention, which featured such stars as the electrifying talent of stage and screen Scott Baio, former model and soap star Antonio Sabato, Jr., and one of those bearded Duck Dynasty guys. No, not him, the other guy.
Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani yelled at everyone, and might have had an actual stroke before being dragged off by Republican operatives. Music was provided by the rock group Queen and written by Freddie Mercury, long known to be a champion of traditional Republican values.
But the trouble began when first-time RNC speaker and wife of presumptive Republican Presidential nominee Donald Trump, Melania Trump gave her remarks. It seemed to be very well received, but the crowd was confused by Mrs. Trump’s repeated references to “Barack and I.” The polite crowd tried to ignore the remarks, but the grumbles became noticeable after she referred to raising her girls “Sasha and Malia.”
Donald Trump, caught in a rare moment of accuracy, referred to the speech as “simply incredible.”
Several others said it was the best speech in years, possibly about eight of them. Michelle Obama remarked that it was a great speech, adding, “I couldn’t have done it better myself!”
Rick Astley was unavailable for comment.