Donald Trump: I Love Racist People, Because Racist People Love Me

It’s no secret Donald Trump will take any support he can get from anyone, anywhere, at any time. Being the businessman that he is, he knows there’s no such thing as bad press, and no such thing as too much support, because just like with a business, a dollar earned is a dollar earned — the same goes for earning a vote.

Trump knows that he’s not doing too well amongst Latino voters, although he’ll still declare that he’s winning over the hearts and minds of the “Hispanics.” He knows that he’s likely not going to sway any Democrats in his direction, so, he’s been focusing his energy in the direction of those who will believe what he is selling them — stupid racist people.

There are apparently an abundance of people out there in the United States who are certain that Trump is “just like them” and will “lead the country in the right direction.” They feel that he best “represents the things that are important” to them, like “guns” and keeping “immigrants away from our neighborhoods.”  Things like “opening a Denny’s at the corner of Route 3 and Main St.” — you know, things that matter most.

When it comes to actual ideas of how to better the country, most Trump supporters don’t seem to have any ideas beyond what would make their immediate life better, “like taco Tuesdays” and “all-day happy hour and the Rusty Spoon over on Pleasant St.” Most of his supporters actually seem to be fairly certain the earth is still flat, Barack Obama was born in Kenya, taxes aren’t necessary to fund anything, including the military they love, and bubbles are magical wind objects made of spirit dust and honey.

When Free Wood Post caught up with Trump, he let us know his feelings on the people he’s been able to convince to believe him:

“It’s pretty clear I’m popular with a lot of people. I mean, look at the numbers. I’m winning everywhere. Everywhere. What I’ve come to find, and what seems to be the secret to my success is that there are a lot of racist people in every single state. There’s not one state that doesn’t have their fair share of racist idiots. So, I figured I’d tap into this market, and it’s unbelievable the success I’ve been having. I love racist people, because racist people love me. I’m leading in the polls amongst the racists. And stupid people, too. I can tell them anything and they’ll believe it. I can tell them I’ll build a bowling alley next to the local greasy spoon and they’ll line up with their support. I’ll tell them I’ll keep them safe from all the nasty immigrants who come here to work for me, I mean, steal our jobs, and they’ll run to their wallets to finance my campaign. It’s really quite something.”

And Trump’s success is quite evident with recent numbers and victories overwhelmingly showing the business mogul in the lead in many states. So, it may be true, the secret to Donald Trump’s success is the overwhelming number of racist and stupid people in the United States.


Featured image via flickr

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