NEW DISCOVERY: First Half of Second Amendment

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It has been brought to the attention of Free Wood Post that there has been a remarkable new discovery that may be a game changer.

There appears to be an undiscovered first half to the second amendment. For the longest time, gun enthusiasts, the NRA, and right-wingers alike have been using the second half of the second amendment to make their case for the freedom to own as many firearms as possible within the span of one lifetime.

“I was unaware there was a first half to the second amendment,” said Wayne LaPierre, NRA Vice President. “I always just assumed it only read, “the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.” I had no idea that it meant to arm the standing state militias at the time. It apparently also says, “A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state..” Well I guess a well regulated militia is no longer necessary seeing as we have the United States Military, and the National Guard at the ready to protect us. I’m going to have to rethink everything. Now, I’m just going to have to be honest with my true intentions and can no longer use the second amendment as my reason for so many guns in the U.S. Now, I’ll just to say it’s because I’m in deep with the gun manufacturers and am trying to make as much money as possible. Dang it! This is going to take a lot of PR to overcome.”

This new discovery comes a time of great debate over the pursuit seemingly limitless firearm ownership. People have now seen the first half of the second amendment states that if federally regulated militias are necessary, they may be fully armed. However, state militias are no longer necessary due to the United States military. It seems the second half of the second amendment was to arm the first half of the second amendment. Perhaps the second amendment may really need to be updated to meet current requirements and standards of necessary ownership. It definitely puts a kink in the NRA’s plan of having an “every man, woman, and child for themselves mentality” like that of the Wild West or Prehistoric times before civilization taught us we work better in tribes (communities).

Free Wood Post will keep you updated as news of this discovery ripples throughout the nation.

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