According to some folks across the United States, granting equality means fewer rights for themselves. It is their belief that as others gain rights, they themselves lose them.
The charity “Dictionaries For Fox News Viewers” has taken it upon themselves to try and get rid of any confusion.
Upon handing out dictionaries to show these people what the word ‘equality’ means, many seemed dumbfounded.
equal·i·ty noun \i-ˈkwä-lə-tē\
– The quality or state of being equal : the quality or state of having the same rights, social status, etc.
“Well I had no idea!” said Buzzy Finklestead of Piedmont, North Dakota. “It means the same rights? They’re not actually taking them from me? I get to keep mine and they just get the same ones I already have? Well I’ll be…”
“I thought if people who didn’t have the same rights as me all of sudden got those rights, I’d be forced to give mine up. At least that’s what they told me on Fox News,” said Sally Hickenpomp of Jersey City, West Virgina.
“I just want to feel superior to others,” said Hubert Wellyton, of Diego, Georgia in a moment of sincere honesty.
Free Wood Post was pleasantly surprised to find after most people learned the definition of equality, they no longer felt threatened they were going to lose their existing rights. When the charity suggested turning off Fox News altogether, they were told the liberal media is lying and wants us all to be Communists. At which point the charity just gave up trying.