Tiger Woods Hopes Legalizing Gay Marriage Will Be A Slippery Slope to Polygamy

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The slim chance that legalizing same-sex marriage will lead to polygamy is a slippery slope that many opponents of same-sex marriage fear, but that is not the case for golfer Tiger Woods.

In an interview published in the latest issue of Sports Illustrated, Woods expresses not only his desire to have multiple wives, but his hope that the legalization of gay marriage will help polygamy become legal as well.

“When I was married to Elin, I had many affairs with many women,” says Woods in the interview, “and that really damaged my career. But if polygamy were legal, my affairs would not have been wrong. They wouldn’t have been affairs at all because I would have married those women too – all 390 of them.”

When asked why he wishes to have so many wives, Woods replies that he believes that love is different for every person.

“Monogamy, schmonogamy. I’m a rich and famous athlete. Why have just one when you can have them all? Hey, that would make for a good Nike ad. We’ll just tell the public that it’s about winning trophies or something. Anyway, I’m just not the kind of guy who can be with only one person. I guess I found that out the hard way…no pun intended.”

Woods also states that he believes that the legalization of same-sex marriage is on the horizon.

“The gay marriage movement is making a lot of progress. It will be legal in the whole country soon; I think that’s obvious. And when that happens, I really think people will seriously consider supporting polygamous marriages too. I really hope they do. Picture this, people – you’re sitting on a beach with your arm around your wife. Now, picture this – you’re sitting on a beach with your twelve wives all around you. Which scenario sounds better? I think we all know.”

Countries like Canada and the Netherlands, where same-sex marriage has been legal for several years, still prohibit polygamous marriages. Unfortunately for Woods, it looks like his wish is unlikely to be fulfilled.

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