For over 150 years, the Aesop’s Fables classic “The Tortoise and the Hare” has been instructing children that “slow and steady wins the race”, yet over the years the moral lesson has lost credibility even with the younger set who believes in Santa and Unicorns. They consistently see that a faster runner will in fact always win a race, especially when one of the racers is as slow as a turtle.
Millions of children have pointed out through the years that the hare would have won even by just walking the whole way. Or even crawling. His only real mistake was to stop and take a nap. Usain Bolt never takes a nap during any of his races, and he destroys world class sprinters. Who are way faster than a tortoise.
One boy’s opinion was commonly echoed by kids across the country. “In gym class, I always run slow and steady, just like the story says. I never take a break or stop for a snack, but every time I finish in last place. I never win the race. This story is bullshit,” said 10 year old student Maurice Lassas from Des Moines, Iowa.
As a result, Aesop’s Fables will be changed in future editions to strike “slow and steady wins the race”. It will instead instruct that you’ll be fine as long as you accept races only with an opponent whom you maintain a huge speed advantage over and make sure you wait until after the race to take a nap.