Rush Limbaugh Livid Over Hostess Closure: This is All Michelle Obama’s Fault, I Feel As Though a Part of Me is Dying

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Rush Limbaugh took to the airwaves this morning visibly upset after hearing news of Hostess Brands Inc. shutting down. He was beside himself trying to come to terms with this loss of the iconic 85-year-old maker of treats. He most fervently placed blame on First Lady Michelle Obama. It seems he is sure the reason Hostess is closing down is because of her “Socialist push” for healthy eating.

Limbaugh in an apparent moment of panic rambled,

“I can’t believe this, folks. I simply can’t believe it. The Socialist takeover of our nation is now taking away an American icon, Hostess. No longer will we enjoy Twinkies, Ding Dongs, and Wonder Bread with our loved ones, but rather we will be forced to chew on carrots and celery like animals! I truly blame the First Lady and her Socialist push for healthy food. This is all Michelle Obama’s fault, I feel as though a part of me is dying. We can’t let this happen! Not in America! We need our food made of chemicals and pretend sugar filled with preservatives. I don’t like knowing what I’m eating. Carrots?! Apples?! Strawberries?! How boring does this White House want us to be?! We’re not Americans unless we’re eating things that are bad for us. It’s what makes us great! I’m so upset right now I think I need go to a commercial. We’ll be right back.”

Poor guy. Someone should make sure he gets one of the last few remaining boxes of his favorite goodies.

The White House reports that they had absolutely nothing to do with the Hostess Brands Inc. closure, and that it is apparently closing after failing to reach an agreement on wage and pension cuts with its bakers’ union. It seems after selling out to a private equity firm, Hostess forgot about its employees and decided to only care about fortunes for themselves. Apparently it was not a good business strategy, the workers got pissed as their pensions vanished, and eventually Hostess went bankrupt again defaulting on its obligations. Mismanagement led to the closure, and Michelle Obama is not a managing partner, so blaming her seems a little out of line.


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