Karl Rove Shakes Fist, Stomps on Hat

During a brief, rare interview with CNN reporter Soledad O’Brien following President Obama’s re-election speech, conservative billionaire and notorious GOP financier David H. Koch was shown stroking his long handlebar mustache malevolently and telling voters, “I’ll get you next time, see. Nyeahhh.”

“By the end of 2016 I’ll own two-thirds of Congress, and I’ll be the one writing the laws, see,” Koch added. “I’ll have my limo-driver nominated to the Supreme Court, nyeahhh. And then I’ll buy out every last one of you– and your grandmothers too!”

Koch then twirled his enormous black cape around himself and promptly vanished.

Republican adviser Karl Rove expressed similar sentiments when a news crew caught up with him shortly after his explosive appearance at the Fox News studio, during which he repeatedly questioned the network’s Ohio projection as votes were tallied.

Shaking his fist angrily at the camera, Rove appeared to be addressing voters directly. “You people get back here,” he snarled. “I’m not finished with you yet!” After another five minutes of shaking his fist and yelling obscenities, he announced, “You haven’t seen the last of old Karl, you hear?” Rove then removed his hat, threw it angrily at the ground, and stomped on it.

He was later seen scraping the hat off the studio floor and muttering, “What have I done? This was my favorite hat.  This is all Obama’s fault.”



Molly is a humorist & satirist from NYC.  You can read more of her work on her blog,  I Heard Tell or by visiting her Facebook Page.

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