‘Marxism no longer corresponds to reality’ says Man in Giant Hat who speaks to Invisible Cloud People

Pope Benedict XVI criticized Cuba’s Marxist system earlier today, saying he and the all-powerful being he personally represents find it backwards and out of step with common sense.  Denouncing the Cuban regime in a language that’s been dead for centuries, Benedict noted that Marxism’s focus on state control of the means of production would actually work quite well if – like the Pope – Raul Castro was incapable of making mistakes.

The Associated Press attempted to contact the Pope for an interview, but was informed by Vatican officials that Benedict was busy preparing the “Holy Teleportation Ritual of St. Charles” for his upcoming visit to Cuba.

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