A recent survey of thousands of women across the country found that a majority of abortion seekers are actually confused as to what they are doing.
Conservatives claim these statistics prove that new state laws requiring that women undergo a transvaginal ultrasound prior to receiving an abortion are necessary.
One woman surveyed said, “The doctor I went to was like, ‘before I can perform this service, I am legally required to show you a video of the fetus’ and I was all, ‘The huh? What the hell are you talking about? What’s a fetus?'”
The woman says she had gone to the doctor to have the procedure because all her friends were talking about this new thing called abortion and it sounded cool.
“I thought getting an abortion was just a new craze, like getting a mustache tattoo on your index finger,” she said. “I had no idea there was a gestating human embryo involved. How did that get in there, anyway?”
She added, “Good thing I was still able to get it taken care of. I am SO not ready to be a parent.”
Another woman, who had gotten lost on the way to a rock concert and wandered into an abortion clinic, where she was promptly signed up for the procedure, noted that, “It was totally helpful having a wand shoved up my vagina and so I could see what was in my stomach, because before I thought it was just a burrito I was having trouble digesting.”
Although reminded at length by counselors that she had many options available aside from abortion, including carrying the baby to term and either putting it up for adoption or caring for it for 18 years, she still opted to have the procedure done.
“I’m way skinnier now that they took out whatever was in that picture they showed me!” she noted. “Awesome!”