Study Asks, ‘Do Atheists Have Morals?’

On Monday Pajoso Polling released the results of a new poll that found that 93% of atheists believe that their actions are guided by a moral code. Rev. Pat Robertson immediately attacked the study, saying “These findings are just further proof that science is out to indoctrinate our school children with their satanic rituals and ‘peer-reviewed studies”. Likewise Rev. Rick Warren responded by posing the question, “How can atheists know that it is wrong to kill if they don’t have the Ten Commandments?”  Dr. James Dobson questioned the legitimacy of the study, “But how do they define morals? For instance do they keep the Sabbath? Have they sold their daughters into slavery? Have they stoned any homosexuals recently?  Any good Christian knows that the Bible commands us to do these things.” Outspoken atheist Dr. Richard Dawkins defended the study’s findings, “It backs up everything I have said for years.   I may be an arrogant and pompous prick, but it does not mean that I lack morals. It’s absolutely true that I am complete and total douche, but I would never kill or steal.”

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