Gaddafi Comes Out of Hiding to Endorse GOP Candidates

In a stunning turn of events, ousted Libyan ruler Muammar Gaddafi emerged from hiding to publicly endorse two GOP Presidential candidates, Rick Perry and Michelle Bachmann.

Reports are still sketchy at this time as apparently Gaddafi communicated his endorsement via cell phone from a hole in the desert. The call was made to Al Jazeera, the Arabic language news network.

According to sources, Gaddafi is in favor of candidate Rick Perry’s views on such subjects as execution, social security and heavily privatizing what are now government-run institutions.

“This Perry has the right idea. First you have to kill as many people as possible even when they are innocent, to instill fear into the people. I like how he runs those state funded executions and even when he has the evidence to prove them innocent he kills them anyway. This, my friend, is how a country should be run.”

It appears that Gaddafi is also a fan of Governor Perry’s plan to privatize many government agencies including: Social Security and Medicare.

When asked to expound on what exactly he found favorable in Perry’s policies the defunct dictator had this to say.

“He [Perry] understands that when you privatize these government services the people believe they are getting what they want (a smaller government). But, you see, the trick is to give all the contracts to friends who help you to control the people. You gain control and make incredible profits at the same time. This is much the same as the Bush family. They have been doing this for many years. Although, I do not like the Bush’s I have learned many ways to run the country.”


Many may wonder why Gaddafi would even consider the idea of supporting Michele Bachmann for the obvious reason that she is a woman and Gaddafi instituted Sharia law in Libya back in the mid-90’s. One of the tenants of Sharia law is that a woman is subject to the whims of any male member of the family. She often may not even be seen by any male other than her husband for the entirety of her life.

“Yes, of course I would not like Michele Bachmann as the President but she would make a good Vice President. She has stated herself that, ‘Women should be subjugated by the husband,’ this is also true in Libya. She also has policies very close to my own purification laws; although, she is a little more extreme than we in Libya.

Here, if someone is caught in a homosexual act they could be imprisoned for five years. It is my understanding that she has much larger plans. Why else hire Peter Waldron to help run her campaign? He is one of the main supporters of the “kill the gays” campaign for our good friends David Bahati and Pastor Martin Ssempa in Uganda. I believe she will reveal her true plans for the gays when elected. In the West the people get all worked up over genocide. But here, we like to call it purification.

I plan to send a great deal of money to both of them; as either will make a more Libyan style America.”

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